The power of conscious communication is magical.
No one likes to take unsolicited advice, yet how many times have we found ourselves giving them when the other person simply wants us to be present and hear their stories without any hidden agenda? How many times did we start a conversation intend to connect, yet end it with heated arguments, charged emotions, or “stonewalling”?
Oftentimes when we try to figure out whether we should leave a team, a relationship, a job, a “toxic” boss or company, or a partner, there is an opportunity for us to learn and practice conscious communication before we make the final decision.
Conscious communication helps us connect on a deeper level; allow things to unfold in a more aligned way; and witness positive changes in ourselves and others in ways that we never thought possible. With practice, it helps us collaborate with others more effectively, increase team morale, and improve team productivity.
“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”~Mahatma Gandhi
Here is my invitation for you to cultivate conscious communication for yourself, your loved ones, and the people you lead in your personal and professional lives.
Maps and tools to practice Conscious Communication.
Below are some tools and maps for you to practice conscious communication to deepen your pure presence and cultivate authentic connections.
Conscious Communication Level 1: Co-listening
One person speaks while the other listens. There is no interrupting, advice, disagreement, approval or judging. Practice presence while listening. Listening fully to another becomes your meditation. Listening is the foundation for all communication.
Don’t forget to journal your experience afterward to deepen your practice.
Conscious Communication Level 2: Mirroring Back
Empathy is defined as understanding, compassion, sympathy, full identification, and responsiveness. In this practice of empathetic presence, after one person speaks, the person who was listening, “mirrors back” to the speaker what they heard that person say. This is not a word-for-word reiteration, but what the listener feels is the essence of the communication received. Once the person has completed reflecting back to the original speaker, the speaker takes an opportunity to thank the partner for being heard. They may also add to, or restate any part of the communication that may need clarity.
Conscious Communication Level 3: Complete Pranakosha communication
Pranakosha communication rests on the practice of co-listening. It’s designed for when defenses may arise and communication may be difficult.
Pranakosha communication is intended to bring healing, clarity, and resolution to all involved. It acknowledges that we are multidimensional beings.
If one aspect of the whole self is not expressed or heard, then the communication is incomplete. Pranakosha Communication is designed to support whole and complete communication, giving voice to all aspects of the self, uncovering assumptions, resistance, hidden agendas, and unconscious beliefs and bringing them to compassionate awareness, integrations, and love.
- Ananda Maya Kosha – My intention/prayer for us is_____. Before initiating PranaKosha Communication it is important to create safe and sacred space. Make sure your partner has the time and energy to be together, and that there are few distractions. Begin with a prayer or intention for healing, guidance, integration and harmony. Cultivate gratitude for each other.
- Anna Maya Kosha – When you_____. State the facts as objectively as possible. What is the behavior or action that you wish to address? These facts are true and “unarguable”, not your judgments of the facts
- Prana Maya Kosha – I experience the energy of _____. Put words to the energetic experience/sensations that happen in your prana body. Keep it simple and without judgment, ie. sad, glad, mad, It is easy to use words that imply that the cause of these sensations is the person you are speaking to. For example, you might say, I feel disrespected or irritated, implying that the other person disrespected or irritated you. Describe how disrespect or irritation feels energetically to you.
- Mano Maya Kosha – I imagine_____. This is your opportunity to speak all the things you imagine and assume when your companion exhibits the stated behavior. Because you are acknowledging it is your imagination and assumption and you are making it up, be sure to mention everything about the reality you create when “x” happens. Make sure you speak your final 5%. Filing your companion in on your inner world of imaginings will help them understand where you go internally. ________________________________
- Prana Maya Kosha – I react by feeling _____. From our imaginings and assumptions, we create and experience a reaction. The reaction is felt, once again, in your prana or lifeforce body. Describe to your partner how you feel when you assume and imagine.
- Anna Maya Kosha – I act out and respond by _____ From our imaginings we create a reaction in the way we respond, act, or behave. Describe to your partner the actions and responses that you act on, or resist acting on, but ponder.
- Vijnana Maya Kosha – An essential need I have is______. State what the core yearning, urge, desire or need is that is at the center of it all. What do you wish to be heard, acknowledged or met? Speak what your deeper needs are. Often we assume that the other knows our needs or has the same needs as us.
- Ana Maya Kosha – I request _____. Once you have the core need identified. Create a request that is realistic and achievable, one that will satisfy you, and create a shift. Consider the request an experience and inquiry in love, kindness, and compassion.
- Ananda Maya Kosha – I am grateful for _____. Acknowledge and appreciate your partner for their willingness and time. Express gratitude for any clarity, resolution, or insight you may have had. Express sincere hope for your future together.
Is there someone in your personal and professional life you wish to practice PranaKosha Communication with?
Complete the steps below with a PranaKosha communication you wish to have.
- My prayer/intention is…
- When you…
- I experience…
- I imagine…
- I react to what I imagined and feel…
- I act out by…
- I need…
- I request…
- I am grateful for…
Pro tip: Have fun with the practice! Perhaps add a little playfulness to it. When you first start with the practice, pick a relatively lower-stake conversation to begin with.
*I offer corporate workshops and retreats. If you are a leader and your team could benefit from learning about conscious communication in an experiential way, let’s connect! Check out my corporate speaking, workshop, and event offerings here.
I’m Sha! I've created this space for inner reflection, emotional healing, personal growth and inspiration. Enjoy a cup of tea and some transformational and practical wellbeing & personal growth tips here.